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Say What?

July 1, 2014
by Dan Voigt , Emmetsburg News

As a journalist, one of the key elements of any story is the headline the grabber, the part that catches your eye as you scan a newspaper page and makes you want to read a story. In this business, sometimes, that grabber can be difficult to come up with and other times, well, you write the first thing that comes to mind, and later when you read it, you wonder just where your mind was when you wrote it.

There have been some great newspaper headlines over the years; the one I always remember seeing was the photo of President Harry Truman grinning and holding up a paper with the banner head, "Dewey Defeats Truman". Obviously, history tells the rest of that story. But, there have been other "oopsies" in the business all over the world. I came across a list of 25 "Great" newspaper headlines this week, and after I quit laughing, I decided these have to be shared. The headline is in bold, and a few have supporting sub heads to go with them, along with what might be the public's first thought of the headline.

Enjoy, and try not to laugh too hard

Army Vehicle Disappears An Australian army vehicle worth $74,000 has gone missing after being painted with camouflage. Good job there, soldiers. Now drop and give me 20!

Man Accused of Killing Lawyer Receives a New Attorney Do ya think?

Mayor Parris to Homeless: "Go Home" Seriously?

Missippi's Literacy Program Shows Improvement The spelling errors did this one in from the start

Homicide Victims Rarely Talk To Police Usually not, but maybe in a Twilight Zone episode

Utah Poison Control Center Reminds Everyone Not To Take Poison Yep, earned their paycheck that day.

Most Earthquake Damage Caused by Shaking Tell us something that wasn't quite so obvious

Waterford Boy, 8, Saves Sister's Life "I wouldn't do it again. She's been a pain this week" Gotta love the honesty of a kid!

Federal Agents Raid Gun Shop, Fine Weapons What, no donuts?

Statistics Show Teen Pregnancy Drops Off Significantly After Age 25 - Let's see, last time I knew, teens ran from 13 to 19.

City Unsure Why Sewer Smells Must have been a slooooowww news day.

Attorney Accidentally Sues Himself I'd love to hear that cross-examination in court.

Man Eats Underwear to Beat Breathalyzer Talk about being cotton-mouthed after a hard night at the pub!

State Prisons To Replace Easy-Open Locks Gotta love maximum security!

Bugs Flying Around With Wings are Flying Bugs Thank you, Captain Obvious!

Chick Accuses Some of her Male Colleagues of Sexism Poor Councilwoman Chick, her name didn't exactly help that headline writer any, did it?

Dead Body Found In Cemetery You would think so, wouldn't you?

Deaf People Focus of Fraud "I tried to warn people, and saved some of them from investing, but some didn't listen." Nice excuse, Einstein.

Diana Was Still Alive Hours Before She Died A shining example of sensationalist journalism from Europe.sad

County to Pay $250,000 to Advertise Lack of Funds Trying to drum up publicity to get a tax increase passed. I'll bet it didn't fly any better than a brick.

17 Remain Dead In Morgue Shooting Spree Well I should think so

One-armed Man Applauds Kindness of Strangers a nice article, but the headline makes you scratch your head as in "the sound of one hand clapping?"

Threat Disrupts Plans To Meet About Threats I'd say these folks most definitely have a problem

Midget Sues Grocer, Cites Belittling Remarks Can't we all just get along?

Manly Man Marries Fertile Woman From right here in Iowa, an all-time classic that makes everyone smile.

Every occupation has it moments be they humorous, serious or inspirational. It never hurts to be able to laugh at your stumbles, as long as you learn from them.



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